"... because I'm the boss and I asked you to do it"
or any one of it's derived relatives.
If I ever hear a statement like that pass my lips then I take it as a sign that I've failed somehow as a leader (note, I'm not saying that I don't have the right to say it).
Why?
Because one of my functions as a leader is to provide people a goal/vision to work toward. If they have this then it should be self evident why they do the tasks they do. If someone questions the task then I should take that as a sign that I am not communicating the goal/vision well enough.
The problem is that it takes a lot of effort to communicate a goal/vision, far more than it does to order someone to do something. But that, to me, is the difference between a boss and a leader. A boss's primary function is to get the job done. A leader's primary function is other people and taking them on a journey. The reality of my life is that I am both (and also a worker with a boss), but I'd like to think that I lean toward the leader side of things more.
Even worse than the aforementioned statement is the emotional bullet after the fact eg
" ... by not doing what I asked you are not showing me respect ..."
The statement may be true (although I would always be hesitant to state other peoples intentions - much better to say "I don't feel respected"). However, we should switch it around and if someone hasn't done the task asked of them then take it as a sign that we haven't communicated the "why" clearly enough.
And saying a statement like that is essentially an emotional power-play. No-one can defend themselves under that kind of accusation. And it certainly doesn't help get the task done, nor inspire anyone to do differently next time.
We can always learn something about ourselves from other people even through their inaction.
Sean, while I share most of what you say here, you are assuming that everyone working around you is smart enough so to make you think that if someone doesn't do what you have asked to be done it is because you didn't communicated well enough the goal/vision, and it doesn't have to be that way necessarily. Did it cross your mind that maybe you communicated exceptionally well but others are not capable to get it right? or worse than that, they just don't want to do it?
ReplyDeleteEither way is a leadership failure because as a leader you don't want to have people that isn't smart enough to get it right... ;-) but hey, I know what you mean 100%!
Cheers,
Jordi
Hey Jordi,
ReplyDeleteI agree with your comments. Certainly there are other reasons why things don't get done. Playing the "boss" card is usually a last resort for me ie I know people are smart enough and skilled enough etc. So it comes down to them simply deciding not to do it. So either they don't get the "why" ie my failure as a leader or they disagree.
And as a friend said to me, there are 3 choices when we're asked to do something:
1) Agree and do it;
2) Disagree and do it;
3) Leave.
Too often we attempt to disagree and hang around being a nuisance.